Crafting Fanny The Fairy: Social Pressure
Social pressure is at the heart of Grizelda's story. From the moment she is introduced to society, she is surrounded by people telling her what she should be, how she should behave and what kind of future she should want.
She is expected to be elegant but not arrogant. Intelligent but not intimidating. Beautiful but not vain. Wealthy but not wasteful. Educated but never so educated that she makes a man feel inferior. The contradiction is almost impossible to navigate.
“How will she advance if men are too intimidated to marry her? They seek a wife to care for them, not a business partner to challenge them,” Mrs. Blair fired back in frustration.
Grizelda discovers this during the ball. She is finally in an environment where she feels comfortable discussing science, languages and philosophy. For the first time, she feels as though she might have found people who understand her. Then she overhears a conversation in the kitchen. Suddenly, the same qualities that made her feel confident are being used against her. Her intelligence is described as arrogance. Her ability to correct someone is considered a lack of manners. Her education becomes something that might prevent her from finding a husband.
“Ginni, my dear, you've raised a beautiful daughter with access to the finest education. However, this may not work in her favor.”
This is the moment where Grizelda begins to question herself. The pressure becomes even greater when Mrs. Blair presents Milo as a potential match. Grizelda is expected to consider marrying a man twice her age because of his family name and his need for an heir. The fairy shows her that sacrificing herself to satisfy someone else's expectations could mean losing the very identity that makes her who she is.
"Never allow anyone to make you doubt your identity. Once it's lost, finding it again can be an arduous journey," Fanny advised, her words carrying the weight of experience.
Through Grizelda, I wanted to explore how easily social pressure can become internal pressure. At first, other people tell us what we should be. Eventually, we begin telling ourselves the same things. The hardest part is often not ignoring other people's expectations. It is learning to recognise when those expectations have become our own.